Akio's Journal — April 13th

I am alone. 

Blah, blah, blah, whine, whine. 

Ugh. 

I wonder what Chie is doing. I loved just sitting with her on the floor playing video games. Watching her play video games. Damn she was good at Dark Souls. And most every game actually. She got so into it, but never got mad when she died. She was always in a good mood. 

What happened? We were good together. But she was always off somewhere else. In her mind, I mean. Not actually sure why she was with me in the first place. 

She was cute. She could’ve easily had a better looking, richer boyfriend. 

I liked her cute, poofy cheeks. 

We had a ton of fun together. 

And then she was gone. Didn’t even feel the need to apologize or break up. Just said she was leaving and a couple weeks later, she was gone. 

But it was all somehow . . . okay. Like it just was. I mean, I wasn’t okay with it, but it was all treated like it wasn’t really a big deal. Like it was just something people do. 

Okay. Done with this. Doing something else now. Bye! 

And that was it. 

We messaged for a bit on Mixi. She told me about her job in California, about some of the people she met, the fun things she did. She was posting in her Mixi diary regularly with pictures of the beach, people she met, food, of course, and lots of random stuff. 

But then . . . nothing. The diary posts stopped and she didn’t respond to like ten messages. 

I was worried she was dead or something. 

And then, a couple weeks later, a message popped up. 

“I’m sorry. Been so busy. Hope your life is good. Take care.” 

That was it. 

I didn’t respond. 

I wanted to. I typed out a bunch of replies, but I never sent them. In the end, I just deleted everything and turned off my phone. 

I actually turned it off. 

Just couldn’t deal. 

I sat on the bed and I 

I wanted to cry. I wanted to. I just wanted to let it all come bursting out. But 

I didn’t. There was nothing. Just emptiness. Loneliness. 

And here I am. 

So dumb. 

Who knows where she is now. 

Ugh. I can’t think about girls anyway!! I have got a career to work on. And I have got to get a better assignment!! I have to get out of the lifestyles section at the Dainichi.

At least last week I got to shoot some cool new bronze statues of anime characters in Nerima Ward. 

But what was it today? 

Shots of Kachidoki bridge. Because it hasn’t been lifted for boat traffic since 1970 due to increased vehicle traffic . . . 

Who Cares? 

 

 

Tristram Lowe

Tristram Lowe, Los Angeles, CA